While you wait for Dark Souls to be fixed, here's a mod with 200+ community soapstone messages

The Dark Souls games have been offline for (checks calendar) 113 days now, and while Bandai Namco has promised it's “actively working” on a fix, that's a frustratingly vague assurance for those among us who still play these games daily. I know one person like that, and I only know around a dozen people.

Also spare a thought for Souls newcomers, who may be inspired to play the trilogy in a post-Elden Ring bout of enthusiasm. While the game is offline, features like cooperative play are non-existent, and likewise, the ever-useful soapstone messages won't be there to warn of ambushes, or to point out nice places for jumping. 

Don't worry though, because modders have come to the rescue. Created by modder KingBoreHaha, the Community Message Mod is available for both Dark Souls Remastered and the old Prepare to Die edition, and as the name implies, it adds over 200 “community-submitted soapstone messages”. 

Fair warning, though. I don't think you should expect these messages to be on brand. it's possible that some (or most) will be extremely unhelpful too. Here are some examples, without the context of where they're placed in-game:

• Welcome to Stinksville, population: you
• I shit my pants.
• Bigass fucking worm here
• Thank you for purchasing WinRAR.
• Don’t get slorped
• It sure was nice for Manus to invite us to see the Abyss, ay Luigi? I hope he made lotta spaghetti!
• we’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty.
• hehe oniom
• Try jumping

I can see how two of those could be vaguely helpful (the one about the bigass worm; possibly the one that references Manus). But yeah… the messages themselves are pretty silly. Some of them are funny, some of them are dorky, some of them I just don't understand because I'm getting old.

Arguably more interesting, is that some of the soapstone messages in the mod are accompanied by special effects. The mod listing specifies that there's at least one giant cat (that attacks you), but others will inflict you with status effects, among other things. “Anything could happen, watch out!”

Sounds like a fun way to bring Lordran back to life while we wait for online to start working again. Bandai Namco “don't have an estimate of when this is expected to happen”.